I want to talk to you today about Forgiveness.
Sometimes, life is unfair.
Bad things happen to good people. Accidents, disasters, cancer, break-ups, divorce, unemployment, the list goes on. You have to deal with whatever comes your way, and, a lot of the time, it doesn’t seem right.
Since we were young, our parents and teachers taught us a world view. Generally, this view was a mix of religion and family philosophy. If you are like most of us, you’ve been bombarded with the notion that if you are good, you will be rewarded; and if you are bad you will be punished.
But things don’t always act in accordance with these rules. We see that good things happen to bad people, and that bad things happen to good people. As we grow older, we see the world can be a cruel place. We discover that the things we were taught, are not necessarily true.
“So, what do we do?”
“How do we find happiness and joy if we’re hurt or disappointed?”
One important answer is forgiveness.
We can learn to forgive when bad things happen. This is not to say we should welcome bad things, but when unfortunate things come our way, we have to learn to forgive and accept that bad can come into our life out of nowhere. Learning to forgive helps us to move on more quickly.
When you open your heart and mind to forgive both your teachers and life itself, you give yourself an incredibly precious gift. You open yourself to the Joy of life, by putting bitterness into perspective you allow yourself to find happiness and joy. This is a blessing.
We can, and we must, mourn losses. But we may have to forgive our concept of God or a childhood that didn’t teach us that bad things do indeed happen to good people.
You can reclaim your Peace of mind though. Think about these actions and then use them to help when you feel unhappy. It can help put you in a better frame of mind, and make you happier and more joyous.
Have a Sense of Personal Mission.
Your life counts. It is a blessing that you are here. Figure out your personal mission, have an awareness of who you are and have direction in your life. This will make you a force for good.
Work at Staying Healthy.
Do you take good care of yourself? You have to maintain your Spiritual, Mental and Physical Health. There is joy in knowing that you are protecting yourself and that you are proactive in taking care of your health as well.
We can’t help others if we neglect ourselves.
Embrace the Good in All Things.
You have been hurt; maybe badly, but there is no simple answer in this world for suffering. It’s the human condition and some suffer more or less than others. Just realize that it’s one thing to be a victim but quite another to become a victim of your victim-hood.
You still have dignity. Find the good in any situation and embrace it. A neighbor who cares; a brother who comes through, a beautiful day that warms your heart. There is joy out there, even if you have to dig deep to find it.
Learn to Accept Everything.
Let me preface this by saying that this doesn’t mean to deny or forget that bad things happen, or that people have wronged you. You need to make peace with the bad things in your life. To forgive does not mean to forget. Acceptance means to protect yourself as well as let go of the victim attitude that can poison your life. Let go of toxic anger that only will make you sick.
There is much Happiness in being free from hate.
Sometimes you must grieve in order to forgive. We all go through the classic stages; denial, bargaining, anger, depression and then acceptance. If you choose to forgive in order to live life fresh and realistically, you liberate yourself by opening up to the goodness of the world. It’s OK to mourn the unfair nature of the universe, but you have to make sure you come out of it with your dignity intact.
Life is not easy for any of us. Deal with the bad and accept that it’s not fair. Learn the lessons you receive and make whatever changes to your life you can, to keep those situations from happening again.
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I also offer a Free Coaching Session for anyone who might be curious about what coaching is, or just needs help in some area of life. This session can be done across the globe by phone, Skype, Zoom or Facetime and I use this time to establish or clarify your goals and form the framework needed to achieve fulfillment in the areas of your life where you feel you’re struggling.
Finally, if you have any comments, questions or thoughts on forgiveness, please feel free to leave them in the comments section below or contact me directly at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Thank you and have a great day!